Monday, January 5, 2009

World's Worst Santa

So. This year was the first year I've ever had to really deal with the Santa thing. Isaac started showing interest in him by asking some basic questions to which I would hem and haw or ask him what he thinks in response. I've sort of been dreading this for years. I pride myself on my practically perfect honesty and knew this would taint my record. ANYWAY, after talking with a few people and getting their advice, I planned to do the traditional. Or at least try.

Well, this was the first year that we actually bought christmas presents for the boys that came in boxes (i.e. NOT from the thrift store). Since I never do this (not even for birthdays), I didn't know that packaged toys are much more noticable to little boys than random "items" in what looks like a plastic grocery sack. At least I didn't know until we opened the van door and Isaac asks what's in this bag? and I realize I never took the forklift that he asked Santa for out of the van! OOPS!!! I quickly yank it off the seat and say 'nothing' while I run it into grandma Reynold's house and throw it on the other side of our bed and hurry and go back to the van to go wherever we were going. You'd think I'd learn my lesson. Well, I didn't.

I left the forklift there with the other "Santa" stocking stuffers and figured he'd never go over there. Maybe I felt it would be too deceitful if I were to hide it in the closet. Or maybe I was just too lazy to wrap it. Afterall, I was still looking for a better forklift since the one I found was technically a telehandler, not a forklift (Isaac would know the difference, but still be happy). After Isaac came to me in the living room and asked who the forklift was for I played dumb (no lying involved there!) and when he had forgotten I finally put it in the closet.

Now that he had seen the forklift (and his mother being a bumbling idiot about it), I was sure my perceptive little boy would figure it out. So, to throw him off, Aunt Rebecca suggested we take it out of the box and put a bow on it. To make a super long story even longer...Christmas day went off without any incriminating questions from Isaac. Whew!

Then tonight, (Jan 5th) Matt threatened to take Isaac's forklift back. When Isaac asked why, he snapped back, "Because I'm the one who bought it!" He didn't even realize that he could be giving it all away. Hopefully Isaac won't either!


LisAway said...

Love the Jonesisms, Anne. What smart boys you've got.

I don't know if I've ever talked to you about Santa. When Evie was two Greg told her that there was no Santa and that parents just give their kids presents and say they're from him. I was upset. And shocked. She was not bothered by this AT ALL and we have still ALWAYS had Santa fill the stockings. We don't really talk about it, and the kids know not to say anything because all the other kids think he's a real person, but it's just as fun for them as if they didn't know.

These days when I read on people's blogs about how their 8 year old found out the truth and is so disappointed or other mentionings of The Great Deception*, when I start having those feelings of disgust (I do! Sorry!) I just remind myself that if it wasn't for my dear husband, I might have tried to deceive MY kids, too!

*Especially when they talk about how teaching the kids to believe in Santa is a good way to help kids prepare to understand and believe in Christ. I HATE THAT. Don't people realize what a dumb comparison that is? Yes, believe in him and then years later find out it was all a joke, and you were lied to over and over and over every year, then believe in the true Christ and accept him as your savior and be certain that nobody is pulling your leg about it. Somehow.

Maybe you know about Greg's mother, that she tells "whiteish" lies all the time, and as he grew older, Greg felt completely unable to trust her. I think I'll write a post about that. (I'll let you know when I do so you can read it. It's fascinating.)

So this comment is LONG and not really on topic. I'm glad Isaac didn't pick up on anything! But I still recommend just telling him the truth and continue to have Santa come. Then you can say all you want "Santa won't bring you any presents if you aren't nice!" Just like everyone else does, except he'll know what you mean. I hardly think it's more effective if it's Santa who won't bring them than if it's mom and dad who won't. But I do understand that it's tradition and that "everyone's doing it" and so I'll forgive you if you lie to your kids. :)

Anne said...

Lisa, I thought I talked to you about it? I guess not. I'll skype you today. I feel like Isaac is a unique case, since I tell him everything I know and since he is such a deep thinker/analyzer, it is hard for me to mislead him. It sounds like you guys are the first to feel the same way as i do.

sjw said...

Oh the Santa questioning. My grandpa never admitted his knowledge of who Santa really was. When my aunt was almost a teenager and proclaimed she did not believe in Santa her Christmas presents were not under the tree Christmas morning. After the shock wore off, my grandpa got her to "admit" she still believes in Santa and he just happened to find her gifts behind the chair he was sitting in. Seems a bit extreme, huh? Or you could try asking Santa to leave his mark ala The shoe print is the cutest!

Kasey said...

Great now your kid is going to be the one that ruins it for all the other believers! Way to go Matt. :)

Susan said...

This is SUCH a great example about why I think the whole thing is ridiculous. Just a small part of it though. I totally agree with Lisa, except that I'm the one who always just told my kids. I actually have to tell Lily over and over and she still believes in Santa. So there you go.

But here's the biggest bugger to me, which Kasey reminded me of: I think a "believer" at Christmas time should mean someone who believes in the actual Christmas story! When we were doing the Santa's Lap thing at our Community Center the Santa was spending a long time chatting with Thomas in front of me and Beth (Thomas wasn't on his lap, just standing in front of him.) I could tell bits and pieces of what they were talking about and that Thomas had said he didn't believe in Santa and that it was about Jesus being born, etc. As I brought Lil and Beth up to sit on his lap and he realized they didn't "believe" either and I just said some of the stuff I always say about the real Saint Niklaas and how Santa is related and how it relates to the Christmas season. I thought that when he said "It's about baby Jesus" it was great, but then as they were getting off his lap he said "it's hard to find believers" I at first thought he meant "that's great they believe in Christ and understand what Christmas is really about." then I realized he meant "it's pathetic how no kids believe in Santa these days..."

BTW I highly recommend the Sint Niklaas story as I recently read it: A young man inherited a lot of money. In his town there was a girl who didn't have money necessary for her dowry and he threw the money needed down the chimney. Did this again with her next sister. It became known, and throughout the town when there were similar moments of need there would often be a similar present made. The stockings by the chimney were to "catch" the presents. And the story goes that the people began to make presents to one another and attributing it to Saint Niklaas kept it anonymous.

I have no idea how true any of this is, but I SURE prefer thinking of this as I open a gift marked "from Santa" as it means "someone who wishes me well and wishes to remain anonymous, like Saint Nick of old" rather than "from that big fat red-coated jolly man who lives at the north pole with toy-making elves!" That's just me.

Anne said...

hey, mix up the letters in SANTA and get SATAN. Oh, the commericalism of this time we celebrate the birth of our Savior! Matt Jones

gramalee said...

I have a traumatic Santa memory. When young I did not buy the Santa or God hype. Stories to get me to be good, I thought.

One Christmas my mother asked me something about the doll "Santa" had brought me and I slipped up and made a comment that revealed that I knew she was responsible for the doll. She said nothing but I was devastated. I had hurt my mother by denying this charade she enjoyed. I was ashamed and my day was ruined!

Hence for my children Santa just did the sock thing so he did not have a big value in the day. Giving presents to loved ones was the emphasis. xo

p.s. I read an amusing article once about the Santa "what can I get" emphasis. The author posited that kids would not care if the Loch Ness monster delivered the gifts as long as they got gifts. :)

Trena said...

Anne - you are hilarious! I'm sure Isaac was too excited to be getting a forklift he didn't care who he got it from!! :)

The Sorensen Bunch said...

Way to go Santa--just tell your kids NOT to tell mine...yet!!!ha ha ha LOVE YOU!